August 2003

HeFei

The End of a Long Journey…

The long wait was finally over…. on July 25 our group gathered at the Vancouver Airport. It didn’t seem real that we were actually going, the wait had seemed endless (even longer with SARS). I kept thinking that until our baby was in my arms it still would not seem real. But real it was. After a long plane ride, overnight in Shanghai, a daylong bus ride into Anhui Province to the capital city Hefei, and then one more night wait until the babies would finally arrive. We were told that we should expect them around 3pm. My, how the hours drag when you are waiting, but in an instant at approximately 2:40 a bus arrived in front of the hotel and out came 1,2,3 oh my… 9 beauties. They are whisked away to a meeting room as we scrambled for the elevators to finally hold our children.

When I think back to that moment in time, I’m struck by the shear awe of the situation. We are nine families from 4 Provinces, all from very different backgrounds, but with one very important link; our new children. In a moments time you are handed your baby and life will never be the same again. This little person whom had been just a dream for a very, very long time is suddenly look-ing at you with such intensity, curiosity and yes some fear, it was at that moment when I realized that life for my husband and I and our children, and for all the families with us was complete.

Our stay in Hefei was very relaxing; the hotel was beautiful and thankfully air-conditioned. Gladly, all of the paperwork was completed at our hotel. I say this because during our stay, the temperature was dangerously hot. Most of the days the therm-ometer would rise over 40 degrees. Beijing was a welcome relief from this intense heat, but still hot. We did however get out and experience the culture, by sightseeing under the very capable guide Faye and of course, the ever popular shop-ping (no one was spared from the shopping bug while we were there).

Yulin and her family should be so very proud of their work. To watch Yulin, her brother and sister around the children, you are struck by how much they care and love these babies. To have created this organization and have built it to what it is today out of love for children, is very heart warm-ing. The phrase “life’s work well done” keeps coming to my mind when I think of Yulin.

For those of you who are awaiting your proposals and for those of you who are still thinking about adopting, I say follow your heart, it will guide you. The journey to become parents of a little one from China is a long one, but well worth the wait, the frustration and the worry. God really does perform miracles, just look at the 9 little miracles from Anhui Province.

Lori Mallory

Mom to Maggie (adopted July 2003)

Mom to Hanna (adopted Dec. 2000)

Mom to Lucas (born Nov 1990)

My day on “DADDY SURVIVOR!!”

Five days into being a new dad, I suddenly felt as though I was on some strange reality show, fighting for all I was worth to win an immunity challenge.

The setting – downtown Beijing, China. The temperature – plus 36 with high humidity. The scenario – a gruelling walk through Tiannamen Square and The Forbidden City. The rest of the scenario – a wife (and new mom) with heat stroke half way through the hike.

Thank goodness for a doctor, a couple of nurses, and a bunch of incredibly caring people also playing the game who grac-iously took mom by the arm to help her get to the bus while I walked the last few kilometers with a hot and exhausted Ava in my arms.

Upon our arrival back at the hotel, mom spent the next 12 hours re-hydrating and sleeping off the heat effects while I shifted into survival mode, seeking to meet mom and baby’s needs as best I could. This part of the game began with a generous (and typical) offer from Yulin to stay in our room and look after mom and baby as I ran out for provisions (diapers, formula, water and crackers). Though the supermarket was only a short jaunt, the language barrier proved to the challenge. I felt pretty proud of myself for getting back to the hotel in less than 45 minutes.

As luck would have it, the little one could not be convinced to sleep. Poor Yulin looked frustrated, but at least confirmed our suspicions that Ava was not an easy girl to put to sleep. On Yulin’s departure, the wailing, the hollering, and the desperation to stay out of the crib continued. I was exhausted but had no way out. I learned very quickly that the game we call “parenthood” does not have short cuts.

I tried to look after a few of mom’s needs, then saddled up with Ava in the baby trekker for the afternoon. Her first try at the trekker, and she liked it! We explored all that the hotel had to offer – the business centre, the gift store, 10 minutes on the stair climber and another 10 on the treadmill. All that exercise and still Ava was not tired. With hotel options exhausted, and mom needing a quiet room to sleep we had no choice but to hit the street and do a little shopping.

With Ava in the trekker the two of us must have looked like a multicultural Eskimo family to the people on the street because we sure got a lot of funny looks. In fact, I think just about everybody pointed and laughed. All of the attention gave each of us the energy needed to continue the game. Ava was at her best, as she often is, in busy social surroundings and I treated all the attention as though I was hitting mile 20 in a marathon and receiving cheers from well-wishers along the route.

Our return to the hotel room brought a return to Ava’s tears and angst. Banking on a hunch that another social setting might shift her mood for the better, we decided to leave mom one more time and join our group for supper in a nearby restaurant. There again we were met by an ever-generous Yulin who cooed Ava into a few minutes of sleep and allowed me a few sane moments to enjoy supper with friends (a great happy birthday celebration for Alicia!). Supper, and a few sips of Tsing Tao, turned out to be just what we needed to see us through to bedtime (yes, the Tsing Tao was for daddy). A restful night and a healthy mom in the morning proved that my bid for immunity had been successful!!

So went my initiation to the game of “DADDY SURVIVOR,” and what a great game it is!

Phil Campbell-Enns

An e-mail message sent by Heather Campbell-Enns to family and friends back in Canada. It is about 48 hours after Phil and Heather first saw their daughter Ava.

To: Canada     From: Hefei          July 29, 2003

Hi!

It's 2:50pm on Tuesday here in Hefei. We've been a group of 3 for 24 hrs now. It's amazing how much bonding can happen in that short a time. A big moment today was when another mom held Ava and she "made strange" with her and then snuggled into me when I took her back. She is showing the same kind of attachment with Phil too. He's doing great! This afternoon she finally smiled at each of us (I cried).

Ava seems quite well. She looks healthy so far (some of the girls are getting sniffly noses though). I think she's teething and she was fussy today before lunch. She has 2 teeth on the bottom and one at the top-maybe the other top one is working it's way in, but I'm only guessing. We put her in her crib when she's really tired and she'll do a bunch of wiggling until she falls asleep. She keeps eye contact with us when she's in her crib too- I'll lay down on the bed next to the crib so she can see me while she falls asleep.

We really have no idea yet about the routine that we'll have. Right now it's eat a little, sleep a little, over and over. We're not sure if she naps longer in the am or pm. I'm sure she's exhausted from the day she's had. How traumatic. A hot van ride, a big building, all these people who dared to pick her up, and the camera flashes. Goodness.

I hardly slept last night. Ava slept really well but I couldn't take my eyes off of her for long. She is beautiful. A big head of hair, like Phil's but another inch longer and jet-black! Her eyes are so dark brown that I can't see the pupils. So far she's been a cuddler (one day in) and we think she can sit by herself but she prefers to lounge around leaning on us. Ava comforted herself by sucking on her shirt so we gave her a pacifier and she's taken to it. When it falls out she hauls it back up to her mouth by the string. Sometimes she puts the string in her mouth instead or chews on the ring.

I've shown Ava the family album we brought so you've all been properly introduced. She took a lot of interest in it. Where Phil showed her my picture she looked at it and then at me and back and forth. I think she's figuring us out.

We've had an "inside day" so far today. The China Daily reported that this is a heat wave. Some places on Sunday reached 43C in the area we drove through. It was like an oven in Nanjing. We saw the Yangtze River there but it felt like 50C with the humidity. It's supposed to be cooling in Beijing soon though.

We hope you are all well. We're enjoying our time but we miss you all.

Take good care.

Love 

Heather (for Phil and little Ava)

Lynn Boag

of Guelph, Ontario travelled to Hefei in November 1999 and again this Summer. Natalee is now 4½.

You can imagine my surprise to return to the same city, Hefei, three and a half years later to adopt a sister for Natalee (a.k.a. Hong). Well multiply that by 10, when I found that I was adopting from the same orphanage, Hefei Children’s Welfare Institute! I am told that Kaylee Grace (a.k.a. Kong) resembles her big sister, Natalee Noel. I am having some difficulty seeing this, mind you I have to bear in mind that there is only one clothes size and a couple of shoe sizes between them; all in all about three pounds.

Adopting Kaylee Grace at the same hotel where Natalee and I started our life together in ‘99 was amazing. I wonder what the chances are of that happening. This time I brought a video camera to make a video for the girls upon my return. I can’t think of a more precious gift to give both of them for all of the joy they have bestowed upon me.

Up until we left for China on July 24th, Kaylee’s first birthday, I had all but given up on my dream of raising two daughters. God surely works in mysterious ways. Summer in Hefei will never be forgotten.

Lynn Boag