No Longer Waiting - A Waiting Child Story

When I started my adoption journey four years ago, I knew nothing of the process or the procedure apart from the fact that I knew there were children needing homes and I had been waiting years to add to my family. It was also at this time that I discovered of the internet and soon I was navigating Hotmail and search engines in my own novice way. Shortly after I discovered Yahoo and the rest as they say, is history.

Through the largest Chinese adoption chat group, APC, affectionately known as the “big one“, I saw postings about  children who were part of a program called Waiting Children, matched from within the United  States. Intrigued, I clicked on one of the agency links and soon saw pictures and brief descriptions of beautiful, healthy children waiting for their  forever families. As a teacher, I also soon realized that these children in no way resembled what would be termed “special needs’ in North America, and that  their needs were physical and often fully correctable or already corrected. It was beyond my understanding how a heart, cleft or orthopaedic need could be confused with special needs and I soon knew that this was the route I was going to take.

Luckily, by the time that I was ready to start my homestudy, FOI had just become a participant in CCAA’s Waiting Child program. At the same time, I became hooked on WCC,waitingchildrenChina, and soon was corresponding with  a number of other families  who were involved with WC adoptions. Many have stayed internet friends and for some reason, nearly all the Canadian members were adopting through FOI. Needless to say, my phone bills have also grown over the last four years. One now very close friend joined me on my last adoption journey to my youngest daughter Julia when she traveled for her very handsome son in Kunming.

I broke new ground in PEI becoming the first single to request approval to adopt from China and the first person  to ask for a Waiting Child. While there were a few glitches as we all tried to figure out how to navigate the new program, eventually, I was approved . I will never forget the day I saw my daughter Emily’s picture for the first time. She could have had two heads and eight legs and I would not have noticed. She was and remains my precious , beautiful daughter. Her “special need” was a haemangioma birthmark on her face which had already been laser treated  in China. Today there is little evidence that she ever had anything. My second daughter Julia, had a repaired hole in her heart. Both girls are healthy, developmentally on target and the loves of my life.

The reality in China today is that medical care is very expensive and often beyond the means of the average family as China transitions away from pure socialism and towards  a more Western style of economy. A recent CBC documentary stated that about 90% of people in some rural areas and even 60% of people in a large city such as Shanghai lack medical coverage.

Treatments must be paid for up front and there is little use of credit. A heart surgery which is very routine here might easily cost the equivalent of three years income. While China addresses its growing pains, children are being given up so that they can receive the treatments they need to have a full and productive life. Julia’s heart, although easy to repair and a one time surgery, might have caused significant issues to her heath had she not received the surgery at the time she did. As with many heart babies, she was not a newborn when given up, indicating that she was probably a planned pregnancy and very wanted child.

Amy Eldridge founder of Love Without Boundaries, met recently with CCAA. It is her observation from numbers collected by various orphanages, that the vast majority of children now entering into government care, have some physical need, often very minor. In many cases, the ratio is about eight to one or two without a visible need. As China continues to prosper, programs which reward parents who raise girls have resulted in far fewer abandonments in most areas other than the poorest. In addition, it is no longer illegal to have more than one child and families can pay a fine.

With the signing of Hague, domestic adoption has become a priority as well.

There are however many beautiful waiting children still available with very short time-lines. They can be matched by direct referral by or from agency files. They are the new reality in China and just waiting to find their way into your hearts and homes.

Susan