In the Words of a Cousin
Speech by Brad Fall Newsletter 1997Kelsy, my sister Denise and I entered Canada on November 2nd, 1996 with Yulin. We had a great trip, and left China happy to be heading home, but awed by the complex and beautiful country that we were leaving behind. An experience that I would be happy to repeat – adoption, China, and Family Outreach International. I should note that my experience was unusual in that our group was presented with proposals quite early in our process thus increasing the time from proposal to travel – you can normally expect to wait about 6 weeks to travel after a proposal is offered.
My journey through the adoption process has ended, like many others, with a dream come true. I have just celebrated my first Mother’s day as a Mom - a very special experience! Until I was a Mom, my favourite role in life was being an aunt (to a terrific nephew and three wonderful nieces). Being an aunt is still very special as I observe the relationship which is developing between my daughter and my family. It started out as my journey, but many have been touched by my daughter’s presence. As an illustration, my 13 year old nephew, Brad, has consented to the reprinting of the speech which he wrote, below. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house when he read it to my family. We’re all very proud of him because he also tied for first prize in his school’s grade 8 speech competition, and it is reported that his speech was the only one that received applause! I will let Brad tell the rest:
“It was a cool spring morning when the baby girl was born. Her parents knew, however, that they would be unable to keep her. So she was bundled up and left where she would be found and taken care of.
Meanwhile, in another city a woman had decided to adopt a child and was waiting anxiously to be matched with a child. But there were things that had to be done first before she could adopt. A social worker would visit on several occasions to make sure that her home and lifestyle would be suitable for a child. A passport and visa were needed as well as reference letters saying she would be a good mother, and security clearance to go to another country. A few vaccinations were needed such as a booster shot for diphtheria, tetanus, and polio as well as shots for typhoid and hepatitis A and a series of shots for hepatitis B. She also asked her sister to go with her and her sister agreed to go and help with the baby.
Finally everything was ready but she was not matched with a child yet. Each day she would look in her mailbox hoping there would be something about the child she would adopt. While she was waiting for info about a child, she read books and web pages on international adoption. She would also ask herself questions like - What size of clothes should I take? How much clothes should I take for the baby? Should I take different kinds of formula? What size of diapers should I take and how many? Will my baby be healthy or malnourished? All these questions and more tugged at her mind.
It was a day in July when word of a match with a child finally arrived. The baby was three months old, and there was a report saying she was healthy and had no deformities. There was also a photocopied picture; the photo was not great but the baby looked beautiful nonetheless to the mother.
The woman carried the baby’s folder every day in a backpack. She felt that this was the best way for her to feel close to her baby.
However, there was still paperwork to be done in the adoptive country before a departure date to the country could be set. Word finally arrived that the mother would leave on either August 19 or August 31. She had heard that during this time of year the weather was hot and humid, and she dreaded that, but she thought that all would be fine; after all, she would at least have her baby.
August 19 and 31 passed and there was still no word about the paperwork being cleared. September passed as well and she was still not cleared into that country. The waiting was painful, since the baby was hers, yet she was unable to hold her and care for her. She wondered what the baby’s everyday lifestyle was like, and if she cried, did anyone pick her up?
In early October she was relieved to hear that her flight was on the 19th of Oct, for sure. The flight would leave Ottawa at nine am for a five hour flight to Vancouver. In Vancouver, there was a two hour stopover. After that the woman would get on another plane for an 11 hour flight over Alaska and Siberia to land in Beijing, China. The following day after she arrived there was another 2 hour flight into the town where she would be presented with her child. The anticipation of finally holding her baby was exciting.
Meanwhile in Southern China the baby Liqing was being prepared for the nine hour bus trip into the town where she would be united with her new mother, in the city of Hangzhou.
On the 21st of October, two pm Beijing time, in a government office in Hangzhou, the woman was finally given the baby, whom she had named Kelsy Liqing.
The woman as well as four other families who had also adopted children were to spend two more weeks in China and then return home to Canada.
I wanted to tell this story because the new mother is my aunt, her sister is my Mom and Kelsy is my bright new baby cousin whom is a welcome addition to my family.”